Recently I completed a task that would seem trivial to most people, however it is a major triumph to me. I did something I have never done before. Something so big, it really is something to write home about. Something so big that I have to impart this to you all. It’s the feat of the ages (as contrasted to the funk of the ages, which would describe future’s dorm room a few years ago). I finished a book in three days. Yes, you heard that right, three days. No, it wasn’t a Little Golden Book or something else that has like 10 pages to it. “Nosiree, a real book with words n’ stuff! Only pikters in it were the wuns on the kuvver! Hot spit!  Yuck, yuck!” Okay, enough with that. I am a slow reader. Not because I’m stupid or am dyslexic or anything. No, I just get too distracted (no, I’m not ADD either!) to keep my mind on one book at a time. This causes me to read about 10 books at a time and I never finish any of them in an orderly fashion. I can remember where I am in all of them (The oldest book that I am still sort of reading is Jules Verne’s 20,000 Leagues Under The Sea, from about 7 years ago!) with little difficulty. This has given me much grief through my high school years as I have been accused of many an ailment from ADD to dyslexia or being just plain stupid. While I am a victim to none of these, I have always just had a difficult time focusing on one book at a time. I am interested in too many things to put all of my attention on a single thing… So now that I have clarified that, I want to tell you about this book I just finished...

This is Campbell’s first book, and in some ways it shows. It definitely is not a literary masterpiece in anyway, however it is certainly an entertaining read. As Campbell says in the back of the book “So, another actor writes a book about his glamorous, whirlwind life. Personally, as an ex-Detroiter, that crap bores me to tears.” This book is about a workingman who made it semi-big, has met a lot of interesting people, has been a part of many projects, both large and small and has made a decent (non wealthy) living out of it. All this and maintains a long relationship with a wife and kids and seems to enjoy the niche he found for himself. While Campbell’s life is not that of a glitzy Russell Crowe or tragic like that of Jack Nance he has shown that there are more stories to Hollywood than are told by the “Hollywood Machine”. His is the story of the working stiff. The guy who works his way from the bottom to somewhere comfortable, but not the top. Interestingly the niche has served him well, as he has a large group of fans who follow his work closely, although this hasn’t been much of a financial contribution to him. (I don’t imagine he lives in a huge home with a gazebo and courtyard in the front and huge pool in back and a winter villa in France somewhere.)

The fact of the matter is that the life stories he tells in the book are more simple. Starting with a brief history of his family in the Detroit, Michigan area to his own upbringing he tells about his brothers Mike (the oldest) and Don (just a year older). I could relate to stories of building forts in the forest behind his house, and fighting in small “wars” as I did in my own childhood. I found Mike to be hilarious as he described how he would make up drawings build a tree house or a fortress (I did the same thing, I think I still have some too!). Or when they would prank each other. If you have a brother or sister, you’ll relate to these stories. His memories on being a teenager are funny as well (especially when he talks about checking out the neighborhood girls). The book then takes a ride into his early acting days as a guy who acted in local plays, worked his way into a theatre group, was a production assistant (coffee gopher, clothes launderer) to such people as Tom Smothers amongst others and eventually made a small break into the big world of film with a headlining roll in the cult classic horror film The Evil Dead and its two sequels Evil Dead 2 and Army of Darkness. In between all of this he has had many odd jobs such as driving a cab (with an funny story about a hooker who couldn’t pay...).

Eventually he gets something that starts looking like a career or as he says “It seems to be my lot in life to always have large parts in small movies or small parts in large movies.” More recently he has been seen on TV as the recurring roll in Hercules and Xena as Autolycus, King of Thieves. Some of the other projects he has worked in were: Escape from L.A., Hudsucker Proxy, Brisco County, Jr., Ellen and the new Spiderman movie.

If Chins Could Kill also gives insight on his close, childhood buddy Sam Raimi (who is directing Spiderman) and others who worked with Campbell that have “made it” in Hollywood. If you are a fan of Raimi’s work, it is a fun read (as Campbell is in many of Raimi’s movies). All in all it was a quick read (300 pages) with short chapters and the pace moved along nicely. The forward by Sam and Ivan Raimi (sort of) was a great way to start off this adventure, however I will leave that one up to you to discover!

I did have a couple of gripes though. There seemed to be several editorial problems (which may be the result of the fact that during the writing of this book the first editor left the company) and several misspellings. Now that may not seem like a big thing to some people, I find it annoying that a press let them slip through the cracks. Remember how you got points off your homework for misspellings? Why don’t editors? It also seemed like there were a few things that Campbell references that the referenced material was not in the book, so there were moments of confusion when I wasn’t sure what he was saying. Perhaps this will be addressed in another press of the book, however it may also be attributed to the fact that I read this book before I went to bed, so maybe I’m imagining this.

Bottom line: It was a fun book that gave me some insight on one of my favorite actors, and gave me some hope of a career of my own in the movie industry someday. The working stiff isn’t glamorous to most people who dream of streets paved with gold, but to the regular working stiffs in the world like myself, it seems like good place to be.

-Hollywood

4 out of 5 Monkeys!

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Other Resources for Bruce Campbell:
Bruce Campbell’s Site
Bruce Campbell’s Book Site
Bruce Campbell’s IMDb Listing
The Evil Dead Companion
House of Horrors on Evil Dead